Tomorrow Never Comes.

I have said "tomorrow is the day" so many times over the past twenty years.  But just like everyone else in the free world, I'm in love with all things food so my tomorrow never came.  A year ago and for the first time in my adult life, I made a conscious effort to start dropping some of the excess baggage I have been carrying around since puberty and I won't lie, it hasn't been easy and I've fallen off the wagon multiple times.

At one point during my weight loss journey I wrote a post titled No(body) Is Perfect and in the post I talked about how happy I was with my body and how everyone should just love me for me but just one year after it was written...I had packed on another 18 pounds and I wasn't so happy.happy.joy.joy about my fat ass anymore.

In October I was one doughnut from 250 pounds when my friend Katie announced "today is the day".  We started tracking calories and lost some weight but just like in my previous attempts, I was soon to back pedal.  It was the holidays which brought goodies that sometimes I only see once a year!

{Image}

Well,  now here I am again and they say third time is a charm, right?  My motivator for the past thirty days has been my mother.   I mean no disrespect when I say that she also has been an unhealthy person for many years, just like most of the women in my family but for her to say "this is what we need to do to keep our family together" meant something more.  We were going to do something larger than today, because she was proposing to band together and turn our lives around.

{Rest in Peace Grandma ~ October 7, 2011}

My mom, sister and I have been following the Weight Watchers plan for one month now, which in turn inspired my aunt and cousin to jump on board,  and we developed our own little fat girl society called "The Chub Club." We share food tips, daily struggles/successes and we all have our own goals.  My mom and I want to wear a fancy dress to Alissa's wedding next year, not only wear one but look good in one.

I have researched the Weight Watchers method and it has worked for so many, you need to know that diet and exercise is the only way, there isn't any other way.  Hunger pains were very prevalent during the first two weeks but then subsided...and I hate to sound cliche but honestly if I can do it, anyone can do it.  This comes from somebody who ate out for lunch every single day and probably out for dinner two-three times per week with NO EXERCISE.  I was the poster child for Heart Diseases R' Us.

Okay people, without further ado...my check in after 30 days following the Weight Watchers plan.

 

Every pound that I have lost has inspired me to lose one more.  For the past month all I wanted was to get out of the 230's and I did that.  I haven't been in the 220's for as long as I can remember, but now I am and at the rate of 1-2 pounds per week I could be twenty pounds lighter by summer and that?  Unimaginable...BUT absolutely attainable.

So from somebody who pushed it off every day and would make excuses like:

• You can't start a diet in the middle of a week!  You can.
• I  can't control my sweet tooth during my period!  You can.
• It's my birthday, it's a holiday, my friend is in town!  So what.
• I don't make it to PF Chang's every day, so I'll spurge!  Butyouarestillafatass.

Tomorrow will never come, you won't let it.  Wake up feeling better tomorrow for what you did today and take it one day at a time.   You will never regret taking that walk after dinner so start small.  Start today and inspire somebody, I promise to do whatever I can to inspire you.

Weekend Recap.

{The Evil Mr. Box Head}

Not a whole lot of action this weekend in our household...which left me feeling a little out of sorts being my online class ended Friday night and I had no homework waiting on me for a change. I cleaned up the house and got a few loads of laundry done early Saturday morning while the boys were out getting haircuts and having breakfast so I basically sat around feeling like "now what?"

{I'll Get You Mr. Box Head...And Your Little Dog Too!}

Haylee and I headed to the mall looking for and Easter outfit for Ryan but after hitting all the stores, we came home empty handed.  I have had a peach and white dress for Haylee, a peach shirt and tie for David for about a month now, but when it comes to four year old boys?  No peach in the land...

We were supposed to have a babysitter on Saturday night, but she totally flaked last minute and that was disappointing.  When you think you're going to get out for some adult time and then the carpet gets yanked out from under you?  Disappointing, that's the only word I can come up with.

It worked out though we invited the neighbors to a Mexican restaurant downtown, the margarita took seven weight watcher's points but the drink made it easier to be in an awesome restaurant with four small children.  The food was amazing....thank God I had been saving up my points for date night.

{The Evil Daddy Took Down the Box Head}

Nap time for two days in a row?  Much needed...this afternoon we threw a ham in the crock pot and woke up with dinner nearly ready for eating.  We invited Jon's parents over to eat and be still my heart they showed up with peanut butter brownies.   I skipped the ham, potatoes and corn and instead had a salad and then more than twelve points worth of brownies.  Best. Meal. Ever.

{Evil Daddy Reigns}

Back to the grind tomorrow...I wish I had more excitement to share from the weekend but this family just laid back and chilled.  How about you?

Birthday Cake in Heaven.

{Christmas 2007}

Sometimes when I look through old photos of my grandpa I say to myself "well  Ryan looks about three there so I'll have to go back a little further."  Ryan is the only child of mine who was fortunate enough to have a relationship with my grandpa, and a good one at that.  But now that bond is frozen in time forever because grandpa never saw him to three years old.

{Touch My Foot Again Punk}

Even tonight as I look through pictures on the computer Ryan yelled out "there's grandpa" and I wonder how much longer he will know who the man in the photo is.  I'm pretty sure he cannot remember the man who died when he was only two and a half years old.

Tomorrow would have been my grandpa's 77th birthday and he's been dead three years...it makes me sad when I think about him being gone but even more so for the fact that my children won't know him.  I had him right next door for over thirty years and his laughter was infectious, I have always said he passed down his sense of humor to my mom who in turn passed it to me.  That man could make you laugh like no other and he was so full of life, to think of him in death doesn't seem possible.

My only solace in dealing with my grandparents deaths is knowing they are together now, which is exactly where they wanted to be, so happy birthday grandpa.  I hope you're having cake up there and even more...I hope it's not sugar-free.

Triple Double You {WWW}

{Weight Watchers Spokesperson, Jennifer Hudson}

I have officially been on the Weight Watcher's program for three weeks now and I'll have to say I have stuck pretty tight to the plan.  I'm allowed 35 points per day and then they give you 49 freebie points to use sometime during the week, like if you had a girl's night out because drinks = mega points.

I wavered on using those extra 49 freebie points the first week, some say they use them and some say just the opposite.  I've been cracking into at least half of them every week, usually for sweets.

Thankfully the Weight Watchers name is very well known and alot of products throughout the grocery store are clearly labeled with the points per serving.  I just noticed yesterday a Weight Watchers store in my area so I plan to stop in there as well to see what they have.

I will tell you the app on my phone has been an absolute lifesaver!  I calculate the serving size of anything with this handy dandy little gadget...and don't get me started on Weight Watchers scanner I downloaded.  In the store you can just scan every single box of rice (for example) to see which one pulls up the least amount of points per serving.

In October when I started counting calories I began losing slowly, and there were some stepping stones...like when my grandma and her sister died in the same week or during the holidays when I gorged on everything I had been missing.  I started going to the gym in January and overall lost about 16 pounds on my own before I began getting off track, eating more and creeping back into my old ways.

Then three weeks ago my mother joined Weight Watchers because she has struggled for years just like the rest of the girls in my family.  The next day my sister joined and I couldn't let the boat pull out, leaving me behind!  I joined online and since then my aunt Amy has as well.  I have lost 7.9 pounds in the past three weeks, putting me at a total weight loss of 19.8 pounds which I am totally rounding to twenty!

Okay, real talk.

My starting weight in October was...ugh, I hate to type it.  It was the number that pushed me over the edge becuase it was getting way to close to a 5 and the 5 scared me.

It was...248.6.



As of my weigh in last Friday I am down twenty pounds and the Weight Watchers plan has been very easy to follow.  I will admit I was starved the first two weeks but since then I am rarely hungry between meals, thankfully becuase I don't know if I would be so strong if I was hungry all the time.

Anyone out there on the Weight Watchers plan I could add to my cirlce of friends?

Sending up an S.O.S.

{Damn, who has 7,500 followers?}

I've tried to ignore it for the past few months but March 1st is approaching and Blogger is doing away with Google Friend Connect.  I'm not sure if that means I will lose all of my followers AND I will be lost to everyone too?  There are some blogs I read on the daily and if I lost my link to all those, I would be sad faced.

I've read a lot of people are moving over to Google+ so today I created an account during my lunch hour and played around and I have no clue as to how I'm going to easily get to a dashboard to see all of the blogs I follow.  Google+ seemed to be nothing more than a clone of Facebook.  I did eventually find a dashboard that listed all of the blogs I currently follow but it wasn't just the click of a button to get there.

I have seen this creepy head girl displaying on a few blogs and read online that this was an easy way to catalog all the blogs you follow and in turn people can follow you back through there, but I'm just not sure which way to go.

So before I'm left out in the cold on March 1st without a follower, can you offer me some advice?  Tell me what you are planning to do and why Google has to be screwing with everything when it seems to be working just fine?  And right after they bought up Picnik which I will also be losing in April!?!?!?  Google is on my last nerve.

Weekend Road Trip.

Alternatively Titled: "A super huge post because I haven't blogged in four days."

{Anticipating the Pain}

We hadn't been to Ohio since April of 2010, which you can relive HERE and HERE, so we've wanted to get back there for a while to visit Jon's extended family. On Friday night the tires hit the pavement right when we got out of work and made the two and a half hour trip to Toledo where a hotel was waiting for us.  That leg of the drive was actually pretty mellow since the kids were tired from the day.  We got to the hotel around 8:30 and hit the pool first thing, it was the reward everyone was waiting for.

{Playing with David's Frisbee on a string}

Once we got back to the room from our dip, everyone put on their pajamas, got a snack and chilled.  Although it was way past everyone's bedtime we all hung out and did our own thing.  I was actually reading a book in the same room with four other people!

On Saturday morning we got up early and hit the road.  Jon and I commented many times that driving in Michigan is nothing like Ohio...there is nothing to look at once you hit the border.  Flat grounds, open fields and a few farms.  The kicker is there is nothing to look at AND you can only drive 65 miles per hour, which cramps my style big time.

By lunchtime we arrived into Jon's hometown and his plan was to take us by his old stomping grounds and show the kids where he grew up and went to school.  Frankly they could have given a rat's, but it was interesting to me.

{Fenton Street - childhood home}

{Second Avenue - teenager home}

We pretty much felt like creepers for stopping across the street to take photos, especially since there was a little boy playing in the yard on Fenton Street.  I think Jon wanted more than anything to walk up to the door and ask to look inside.

After going by the houses and schools, we made our way to the cemetary to visit his gran and pap and there presence was immediately felt when the previously cloudy sky allowed the sun to peek through and the warm rays shine down where we stood.

We then swung into grandpa's house but unfortunately he wasn't home, we should have let him know to expect us because I really wanted to see him!  Everyone says he's a grouchy old bird, but that's just how I like my old people.

It must have seemed like forever for uncle Ron's family who was waiting on us, but finally we arrived and just in time for lunch!  The kids were so happy to get out of the car and make their way in for some pizza with their little cousins.

Eva took right to getting Haylee prepped for the upcoming birthday party, a girl can't just be greeting guests without some nail polish on! 

Ryan and Ronnie holed up in the bedroom and I swear we didn't hear from them again for the entire afternoon.  They had every toy out of the closet and were having a great time.  Never once complained, whined, fought, nothing...damn, I was in mother-of-silent-toddlers-heaven on Saturday afternoon.

Cousin Devin is in the Marines and he took to my littlest ones like he birthed them himself.  He was doting on Haylee as if they were long lost pals and giving Ryan a hard time like they were brothers.  I'll tell you, I haven't had much interaction with Devin in previous visits but I really came to like this kid while we were there!

 {How does camo suit me?}

So, Aunt Marilyn showed up with a box for whomever had a size 8 1/2 shoe and in true Cinderella style, we determine I am the only one in the room with size 8 1/2.  I pulled the shoes out of the box and immediately feel like...oh my gosh they are Rainbow Brite clogs, I will never.

But then as the sun hit them and they became way more glittery I decided that I was pretty much in love with them.  Plus they are Dansko which cost her $130.00 and I've never had $130.00 shoes before so I don't give a damn what anyone thinks, I'm going to ride them until I die.

 

Finally it was party time and cars started piling in the driveway like we were holding a church service!  I've said it before and I'll say it again, Ohio people have mad hospitality...everyone's hugging and telling you how much they've missed you and are just genuinely happy to sit and visit.

 {Uncle Jim}

 {Ryan and Uncle Rick}

And this guy...rolled around on the ground with the kids from the minute he walked in the door until the minute he left!  He was dancing to the songs on the Xbox, he was playing with cars and catering to every child's want or need.

{Eva's Awesome Cake}

Yes this was another function where Haylee could not wrap her head around the fact that it was not her party.  There were gift bags for the oodles of little girls that walked through the door and Haylee spent most of her evening running to hide with contraband bags.  She would steal the good candy out of poor unsuspecting girl's bags and then say it was from her own.

Another new person I'm in love with?  Lori.  I almost went home to stay in her guest bedroom because she has a dog who rings a bell when she wants to go outside to pee, plus she's super funny and down to earth.

{Lori and Devin - sister and brother}

Everyone agreed that Haylee was the entertainment for the evening, she was flitting around the room talking to each person, being loud and obnoxious and trying to steal more treats from whomever had one.

 

{My favorite aunts, Ruth and Cindi}

I wish these two aunts lived closer because I'm pretty sure I would fall in love with them as much as David has.  They just love our kids even though they seriously see them once a year, I have mentioned before how they send packages in the mail so the kids don't forget their names. Awesome people, for real...I might have gotten a lump in my throat when I hugged them goodbye.

 

{Aunt Jen and Grady}

Aunt Jen reminds me of my grandma so much, I only talked to her for a little bit and tried to be overly nice because I'll be frank...she intimidates me, though I haven't figure that one out yet.

{Aunt Vickie and Rick}

As it started getting late, everyone slowly made their way to the door and said goodbye.  The party we had driven so far to attend was over and honestly after all the day's driving?  We were tired. 

The kids hopped into the bathtub they had been eyeballing all day, I'm pretty sure Haylee's hair would have stuck to a pillow without a bath after eating every sucker meant for the other party-goers.

Devin was kind enough to sleep on the couch so we could take over his basement bedroom.  I won't say it was the best night's sleep we ever had, but....Haylee and I took the double bed while Jon and Ryan took the sleeping bags on the floor.  Haylee fell out once and then woke up crying twice more for no reason.  She kicked, she hogged, she made my night miserable.  But, I wasn't sleeping on the floor like Jon was so I'm thinking I got the bargain.

{Morning cartoons on a TV bigger than my car}

This morning our hosts graciously made us the same breakfast they had on Christmas morning which means our visit was pretty special.  Through lots of hugs and I love you's we made our way back to the car and were bound for Cabella's, a halfway point on our way back to Michigan.

{This is how I found her ready to leave}

Two and a half hours later we arrived in Dundee, none of us had ever been there but since reading my aunt's blog post about it last week? We wanted to see all the stuffed dead things too.  I seriously think it's awesome they have huge fish tanks and museum like displays all through their store, I've never seen anything like it.

 {I love these three faces...so cute together}

 {Ryan wished for a real deer for a pet}

As we walked through the store looking at all the stuffed dead heads, I was never so happy as when a kid exclaimed to his dad "look, there is a honey badger!"  If you are living in the dark ages and don't know about all the hype about honey badger, please go on YouTube and search it.  Funny stuff.

{Wolverine or Honey Badger?  You decide.}

We went into the homemade fudge shop to get a treat before we got back on the road, everyone picked out their own special piece and it was heavenly. 

{I love that he always has to make the bite face too}

What should have been a 5 1/2 hour trip took us about 7 1/2 hours today, but it was well worth it.  Although it got hairy a few times in the car, we had a lot of fun this weekend at the hotel...at the party...and at Cabella's today.  

Honestly, the time away from the computer was nice too.  I had all my school work caught up, I blew off blogging and checking Facebook and I spent my time reading a real live book for a change.  Well, now back to reality I guess...schoolwork awaits for me tomorrow and so does the place who's paying the bills every month.

Oh, Happy Heart.

Haters gonna hate and I know alot of people call Valentine's Day a Hallmark holiday but any day with the word "holiday" in it, gets me super excited.  I don't remember my mom making a huge fuss over holidays when we were growing up but I know we always had a red shirt ready to wear to school on Valentine's Day and sometimes a cute little pin which I'm sure she got from the grocery store where she worked at.  Hmmm, I wonder if she turned me this way or if I was born this way?

Anyway, this weekend I picked up a box of Valentine cards for each of the kids so in addition to the crafts we did at my dad's house, I had plans to do our own thing too.  Last night Haylee scribbled circles onto her Dora cards while Ryan took his time and did well on his baseball ones.  We put a little baggie of conversation hearts with each card so they could hand them out to their friends at daycare.

Jon came home late after a baseball association meeting and I'm sure having a gift in his car since lunch time was killing him...he peeked around the corner and said "you know I'm not good at giving gifts, do you want yours now?"  As I was all bundled up in a blanket it was perfect timing for my "practical, not romantic" gift of a heated blanket.  He knows I do homework in the basement at night and it's super cold so he gets points for not wasting money on flowers or candy that isn't on the diet. 

{No More Crawling Into Bed with Icy Cold Feet}

Today the kids were excited to get dressed in their red clothes, I try to carry on all the good memories I have from my childhood...which includes holiday shirts for every.single.holiday until they tell me they are too cool for them.  Today, everyone was dressed in red.

Except for not this red...this was the swimsuit Haylee rocked all day Saturday.

I had to wait until we got home tonight to take our "red picture" because we not only had red shirts, we had Valentine's Day lips (which nearly gagged Haylee so we only had one take).

I can remember buying these lips for David when he was little too.  Hold on for a minute while I dig through my archives and see if I can find them...

{Yup, here is David in 2004}

Jon was supposed to have a training class at the fire department tonight so we were going to be eating alone but he decided to blow it off and bring home dinner for everyone instead.  Always practical, sometimes romantical.